PART 1: When ‘Help’ Is a Trap: Why Even Christians Tempt Others in Style

 

The Bait: A Divine Opportunity

A few years ago, I was offered a job overseas through a Pastor and a "brother" in Christ. At first, everything seemed perfect—their kindness, their prayers, their insistence that this was "God’s plan" for me. Grateful, I stepped into what I believed was an open door from the Lord.

But slowly, things changed. Promises made in private were denied in public. Requests for accountability were dismissed as "distrust." The Pastor, though thousands of miles away, demanded control over decisions that weren’t his to make. The "brother" assigned to assist me began asking probing questions, reporting back every detail, twisting conversations to fit a narrative I didn’t recognize.

What started as a blessing felt like a spiritual spy mission—with me as the target.

The Hook: Control Wrapped in Scripture

The moment I questioned inconsistencies, the tone shifted. Verses about "submission to authority" were weaponized. My concerns were labeled rebellion. The brother, once warm, became cold—setting up scenarios to trap me in contradictions.

I realized too late: Not every helping hand is clean.
Some people don’t serve—they manage.
They don’t empower—they control.

And the most dangerous part? They do it all in Jesus’ name.

The Biblical Parallel: Wolves in Designer Clothing

Jesus warned, "Watch out for false prophets… inwardly they are ferocious wolves" (Matthew 7:15). Paul wept over those who "pretend to be apostles of Christ" (2 Corinthians 11:13). My story wasn’t unique—it was ancient.

How stylish temptation works in the Church:

1. The Bait: Offers wrapped in spiritual language ("God told me to help you").
2. The Hook: Gradual isolation from other voices ("We know what’s best for you").
3. The Trap: Punishment for questioning ("You’re attacking God’s anointed").

The Escape: Losing a Job, Gaining Discernment

When I refused to play along, the "brother" escalated. False accusations. Twisted words. Eventually, I lost the job—but not before God opened my eyes.

What Satan meant for harm, God used for training in discernment (Hebrews 5:14).

• I learned: Not every open door is from God (Revelation 3:8).
• I saw: Manipulators fear exposure (John 3:20).
• I thanked Him: For the exit I didn’t choose but desperately needed.

How to Spot "Stylish Temptation" in the Church

Ask yourself:

1. Does this "help" come with unhealthy strings attached?
2. Are my concerns met with defensiveness or gaslighting?
3. Is there a pattern of broken promises?

If yes—run. Better to walk away from a "blessing" than to surrender to a trap.

A Warning and a Hope

To those who’ve been betrayed by people you trusted:

• You’re not crazy. Spiritual abuse is real.
• You’re not alone. Even David asked, "If an enemy were insulting me, I could endure it… but it is you, my equal" (Psalm 55:12-13).
• You’re not without recourse. God sees. He judges justly (2 Timothy 4:14).

Final Thought

I lost a job, but I gained freedom. Some "doors" close because God is protecting you—not punishing you. Stay wise. Test every spirit. And never let anyone remote-control your faith.

"For such people are false apostles, deceitful workers, masquerading as apostles of Christ."
—2 Corinthians 11:13

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Discussion Question:

"Have you ever encountered ‘spiritual manipulation’? How did God reveal the truth to you?"

Prayer:

Heavenly Father, open my eyes to unhealthy influences. Heal my wounds from betrayal, and help me trust Your leadership above all in Jesus’ name. Amen.